Experiencing post-purchase regret? Here's what to do if you're dealing with buyer's remorse

For many buyers, the long and sometimes stressful journey towards home ownership ends with a sense of excitement and relief.

For some, however, those feelings of achievement are quickly overshadowed by second thoughts.

When Ana Asanovic and her partner bought their first home, a townhouse in Melbourne’s inner north, they were met with unease.

Asanovic says the financial commitments of owning a property suddenly added a lot of pressure, as did the uncertainty of whether they’d bought the right place.

“I feel we overpaid … we travel less and we do less of what we love. I’d like to be able to go to Europe more often and see family, but I simply can’t,” she says.

“I wonder if we should have just bought an apartment, had a smaller mortgage and lived a lifestyle more aligned to who we are. Having grown up in Europe in an apartment, I really see nothing wrong with it. It’s great to have the quiet and the space, but at what cost?”

Asanovic’s experience isn’t an isolated one. According to a Compare the Market survey, buyer’s regret affects around 40 per cent of home owners, while Finder estimates it impacts nearly half of first-time buyers.

The reasons are multifold: overpaying, buying a property in poor condition, choosing the wrong location or sacrificing space to save money.

So, what should you do if the purchase of your new home comes with lingering doubts? Here are practical ways to approach the situation.

Normalise your feelings

The first thing to do is realise that your feelings are normal. Regret is a common experience for many buyers, particularly in the immediate aftermath of purchasing or moving into their new home.

Remember, too, that buyer’s regret isn’t black and white. For some, it can manifest as full-blown remorse and grief.

For others, like Asanovic, it’s a somewhat ambivalent grey area: a mix of appreciation for the positives of their home and persistent uncertainty. The entire spectrum of emotions is totally valid.

Remember your ‘why’

Return to the reasons you purchased this property in the first place.

Was it the thoughtful design, the central location close to shops and transport, or the reassurance of owning your own home?

Reminding yourself of your “why” can help shift your perspective.

It’s a tactic Asanovic has used herself, reframing the purchase as a positive and feeling grateful that it fits many of her requirements: “I am thankful we live in a clean, new townhouse on a quiet street and have lovely neighbours … and that is something that has always been important to me,” she says.

Personalise your new space

Adding your own decor, artwork, photos and other things you love can take your new abode from a house to a home.

With personal touches around, you may find it feels a lot more “you”.

If budget allows, you could repaint, redecorate or renovate certain parts of the home that are causing frustration. A refreshed bathroom or kitchen, for instance, could enhance your enjoyment of the place.

Fix the little things

Perhaps there are nagging annoyances around the home that get on your nerves, such as a squeaky door or outdated tapware.

These issues might seem minor, but they can magnify your emotions, making your purchase seem more troublesome than it really is.

Take a bit of time to fix household niggles (or call in the professionals for trickier repairs) and the regret could start to ease.

Get to know the neighbourhood

The more you connect with your surroundings, the more your new location feels like home.

Discover nearby parks, walks and amenities, or a cafe or community hub where you can mingle with your new neighbours.

Local events, markets, groups, libraries, playgroups and sports clubs can also be helpful. If you’ve moved to an area where you don’t know anyone, being surrounded by your community may also alleviate any feelings of isolation.

Reassess your finances

If your mortgage repayments are causing stress or making you feel trapped in your new home, you could explore ways to ease them.

Refinancing is one option; even a slight drop in interest rates might result in a significant reduction in monthly repayments.

You could also consider switching from a variable to a fixed rate to offer more certainty, or explore lender incentives such as offset accounts or redraw facilities.

Remember that financial decisions shouldn’t be made lightly. A licensed financial adviser can help you navigate your situation, review your budget to identify ways to save costs, and guide you on restructuring your mortgage.

Know when it’s more than just regret

Some scenarios signal that buyer’s regret has tipped into something more serious:

• Mortgage repayments that leave you constantly stressed or unable to cover other expenses
• Ongoing unhappiness over months or even years, especially if it impacts your wellbeing
• A genuine mismatch with your family size or location needs
• Tension at home that causes ongoing conflict with your partner or family
• A property that locks you out of life goals, like travel, career moves or schooling options

In such cases, cutting your losses may ultimately prove to be the most practical solution.

If selling is a possibility, assess key factors such as market conditions and resale value. Review your personal finances to determine if selling is within your budget, taking into account agent fees, stamp duty on a new home, and moving costs.

Alternatively, you could rent out your home and move elsewhere temporarily if selling isn’t viable or feels too premature.

Your first port of call should be a real estate agent to understand your home’s potential for resale or rental. You can also chat to a licensed financial adviser to see if it’s financially feasible to offload your property. Together, they can guide you through the risks and benefits of your decision to determine your next move.

Don’t see moving on as a failure; sometimes, the best choice is admitting a home isn’t right and finding one that truly suits your needs.